THE ABUSER

WHO ARE THEY ?

Could be anyone,
who has ever been hurt,
who has ever been abused,
who has ever watched someone being abused.

WHY DO THEY?

They feel big by making you feel small,
they feel strong by making you feel weak,
they feel important by making you feel unimportant,
they feel smart by making you feel dumb,
they feel brave by making you feel scared,
they feel in control by making you feel controlled,
they feel pretty by making you feel ugly,
they feel good by making you feel bad,
they feel right by making you feel wrong.

WHO ARE THEY HITTING?

Could be their father who did,
could be their mother who allowed and took it,
could be themselves for allowing it,
could be anyone, for anything.

HOW DO THEY WORK?

Remove ALL threats,
such as all your friends and family,
who may turn on your light,
all outside contacts,
as you may find comfort, or help, or ideas,
or someone may ASK questions.
They want to isolate you,
to want to have total control,
they want to cause total fear,

HOW TO RECOGNIZE

Jealous for no reason, over critical of your friends and family,
gets very mad or upset for no reason, tell you what to do, rather than talk and suggest, Asks a unreasonable amount of questions, "where were you", "with who", and the such.

Does this person always have to win an argument, will they talk before resorting to violence?

Are they over critical of bosses, teachers or anyone in a position of
authority?

Are they mostly negative, mis-trusting and hateful of the world around
them?

All of these things COULD point in your direction some day,
and you COULD become a threat or an enemy.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Many stay in abusive relationships out of fear, or for the children,
you know it is much worse and more dangerous for the children to stay, if something were to happen to the children, as a result of staying, could it be your fault also?

If you stay out of love, think this through...you SHOULD leave as soon
as possible, because if you made them hurt or kill you, they would go to prison, or get the death sentence, and you wouldn't want someone you loved to have to go through that, would you?

AND, once you are dead, you can't help them hide the body.
 

©Written by: Ed Kassirer
February 24, 2001